#287
The Cloud
A few months back, life tilted. Nothing catastrophic, but heavy enough that I had to choose. Surrender to it, or find something that still gleamed. I chose the latter, though honestly some days that meant Netflix binges without the guilt tax. Some days it meant catching one small thing that went right, even when everything else looked grey. Some days it meant not shaming myself for needing rest.
The hardest part wasn't the weight. It was not shaming myself for how I was handling it.
The Silver Lining
Two months ago I wrote about letting the sunshine in- literally! About SAD and Seattle winters and vitamin D. But there's a metaphorical version of that same practice.
Enter: gratitude journaling.
I wrote every day. About friends and family who reached out to support me during tough times and good times alike. About grueling-but-fueling workouts I indulged in. About the morning coffees I restarted and cute, purple plushies and pens I bought that brought me little joys. It took conscious effort to stop trying to "fix" myself and instead start asking: what's already working here, thus embodying Martin Seligman's (father of positive psychology) PERMA model.
He defines five pillars of flourishing: Positive emotions (the gratitude, the plushies), Engagement (the workout "flow" states), Relationships (the friends who showed up), Meaning, and Accomplishment. Your brain spots problems automatically, that's survival. But survival isn't the same as living aka thriving. When you look for what's already working, there's more than you think.
With this, the heaviness became more easy to deal with, and I no longer treated my own coping mechanisms as a bad thing.
The Rays
Optimism need not be something you're born with. It can be something you practice, put in effort to get better at week after week, especially when you don't want to. Calm reframing instead of harsh reprimand and self-judgment. Turning your attention toward the silver lining without pretending the storm isn't still there.
Looking at the bright side and actually feeling better, not because everything is bright, but because you're the one choosing which direction to face. All you gotta do to thrive is: "Open up your eager eyes!"
